The first time I was nineteen- a late bloomer. But it was worth the wait and it felt right. And for sure I can promise you that now that I know what I was missing I’ll never go back. Let me tell you how I fell in love:
I was schlepping my brand-whore brother around bargain shopping at Plato’s Closet (judge if ye will) when they called to me.
Sarah Beth, they said with their tongues hanging out, don’t you want to wear me?
It went down like this- I’m minding my own business near the shirts and wondering what kind of stain is stuck on this old navy polo when I look up over the racks to check on my bro but LOW AND BEHOLD the pair of perfect shoes are blocking my view.
My first pair of big beautiful badass combat boots.
I took them off the top shelf and of course, because I’m the Cinderella to this story, they were the perfect size. Not too snug but not at all clunky either. Lots of laces with a zipper up the side. As soon as they were on I felt better- more confident, more ready to curbstomp someone if need be (which I never would do).
The thing about the perfect pair of shoes is that they can make you feel like a better version of yourself. Sexy stilettos make you into the next Brittany Spears circa 2001, while a good pair of running sneaks can transform you into Usain Bolt.
And my boots? They make me into a badass chick who won’t take crap from anyone. Who sneers at ner-do-wells in the street and never gets hurt. Sometimes when I’m not even wearing them, when I’m donning yellow wellies and getting yelled at by my boss, or shuffling around in high heels trying to be prettier, I channel my combat boots feeling.
Then I become a fierce girl who spits nails and doesn’t give a fuck about what anyone else says because I have “uncompromising integrity”.
This isn’t a typical love story. It doesn’t end with a boy and a girl and a musical number. But most of us know that’s more trouble than it’s worth anyway. This is a love story about me being able to accept myself.
Combat boots mean I don’t need a boy to tell me that I’m great, or a teacher to tell me that I’m smart, or my parents to reaffirm their positive return on their investment. I am who I am and that is beyond just fine- it is fantastic.
And you are too! Find your perfect pair of shoes and proceed to rock in them.
I can only wish that all of you out there can find a love as true and pure as ours.
Sarah Beth Kaye