by The Rutgers Review Staff and Contributors
Sometimes relationships end with casualties: broken hearts, fractured friend groups, abandoned hang-out spots, and an unforgettable love song or two. One thing is clear—music has the unique ability of encapsulating our memories and the mind has the unique ability of changing our perceptions of those memories over time. Here’s a round-up of songs that we’ve deleted from our libraries or rushed to skip.
“Say Goodbye” by Chris Brown
When me and my ex broke up it’s all I listened to. It’s been four years and I don’t care about him AT ALL anymore but everytime it comes on shuffle it takes me back to how sad I felt for those few months getting over him.
-Sam
“How to Love” by Lil Wayne
Smh I love that song, too bad. No matter where I am and it turns on, my head flashes back to the summer it all happened. It was the best summer and the worst summer at the same time. I lost my best friend. He dedicated this song to me because he said it was about me blah blah. It didn’t take long for that to end. Still love that song low key though.
-Keely
“Mirrors” by Justin Timberlake
I dated him all throughout high school and still kept in contact and hung out in college. But in my sweet sixteen candle to him I put the song lyric “you reflect me and I love that about you,” so the song always reminds me of him.
-Chelsea
“Come and See Me” by Partynextdoor
When we would be in a fight he would ALWAYS put that song on his story so I would always do the same because~petty and stupid~so now since we’re done I can’t even listen to that song.
-Hannah
“Greatest Love Story” by Lanco
Fuck that song lol. I idealized the song and thought ‘oh that’s us or that’s going to be us.’ Now that it’s not us and will never be, it hurts to listen to. I can’t listen to the song anymore without attaching the feelings and emotions I felt at the time.
-Taylor
Chicken Fried by the Zac Brown Band or “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen
Lol I don’t know which one is worse.
I bought my ex and I $300 front row Zac Brown Band tickets and that song was designated as ‘our song’ it would come on everytime we would be in the car and now when I hear it I literally cringe. That song needs to literally never be played.
-Gianna
“I Won’t Give Up” by Jason Mraz
My first teenage relationship we were listening to music and this song came up and we kind of had a moment and it was like a popular ‘relationship song’ then a couple weeks later we broke up.
-Holly
“Stadium Arcadium” by Red Hot Chilli Peppers
The morning after the first night I stayed over we listened to that song. It was one of my first girlfriends so that moment kind of stuck with me.
-Zack
King Krule’s entire 6 Feet Beneath the Moon album
It was my first real relationship therefore it was my first real break-up. We parked in “our spot” that overlooks the New York City skyline. He left his car on the entire time and in the background was King Krule’s album playing. That album dominated my junior year of highschool. It played on repeat for the hour it took to complete the painful dilapidation of anything we once were.
I loved that album until it became the soundtrack to my heartbreak. I still have it in my music library because I don’t want to completely admit that it’s dead to me.
-Brielle
“Anything” by Dave Matthews
Went to a Dave Matthews concert with him and his family and I can’t listen to his music because it makes me cringe and I have to turn it off hahahaha.
-Sophia
“The Middle” by Zedd
He would just sing it ALL the time so whenever I hear it I think of him.
-anonymous
“Typhoon” by Young the Giant
It was my first girlfriend and I was in another country for a good portion of the relationship, we had a playlist of songs we discovered together and this one sticks out.
-Lou
“Stand by Me” by Ben E. King
I can’t listen to the song because it is the song that played when my ex and I had our first kiss. It was the ending credits to the movie Stand by Me.
-Kate
“Let it Go” by James Bay
I find it so amazing how one song can bring back so many feelings. Today, feeling so secure and happy to listen to an old song during a time of unease reveals the beauty of time, time heals all. Whenever I listen to the song, I also find myself comparing my past self to my current self. Who knew a song that brought sad feelings, could become one of reflection and so bittersweet.
-anonymous
“I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith
I never liked this song. I thought it was unbearably corny and hard on the ears- She loved it. She’d sing in her silly sounding Italian accent and twirl around like she had the world at her fingertips. She had this charm and way of speaking that would leave people searching for words, mouths ajar. I started a journal when I met her, I knew she was different, and since she was an exchange student I knew we only had so much time together. I wanted her to have a book of memories, I wanted her to be able to flip to a page and remember how I saw her- glowing on top of a pedestal.
She’d play this song in the car and on her way into school and sometimes at parties. I always told her to shut it off. I told her the song sucked and that I hated it but she played it anyways. I was driving her home and we were late again. This time because of an argument, we weren’t talking and I told her if she played that damn song I’d pull the car over and kiss her. She hit the play button and we stopped on the side of the highway.
I still hate that song, but when I left her at the airport and handed her that journal I realized I was actually going to miss it.
-Caelan
“Heart of Stone” by The Rolling Stones
It was the beginning of the longest winter of my life. That November was nothing but cold rain and clouds looming overhead like funerary drapes. We broke up over the phone. He was crying, but I laughed as if to let him know that everything would be the same as before. I reassured him, “We’re still best friends, no bigs. Let’s talk again in the morning?” I didn’t sleep at all that night. The next morning the realization hit with a hollow clang in my heart. Yeah, we still talked on the phone for the next month or so, but slowly, he went ghost. His texts shortened and so did mine, but I wanted to send burning paragraphs. My pride became a lump in my throat.
I spent New Year’s in the desert, staying up all night to have a little solitude and to avoid the panic I always got when I woke up and remembered. I watched Casino, the high-action Martin Scorsese mob movie, to take my mind off my troubles, but it honestly didn’t help. Ace, the sharply dressed bookie, lit Ginger’s cigarettes and slipped her $50 dollar bills with nothing but adoration in his eyes. She didn’t want him and wouldn’t love him back, but he pursued her anyway. He doted on her as the bluesy Rolling Stones song played gently in the background and my heart sunk even more. The bassline snaked its way into my head and lived there, frozen through January and the eternal gloom of February. I watched Casino like ten more times because romance aside, the plot was great and it was the only thing on my phone during a super long winter break where I had no internet. A+ movie, amazing soundtrack, but I can’t listen to that song anymore.
-anonymous