What would life be like if your lover was far far away from you? For Elena, her long-distance relationship is always in the passionate phase.
Elena and Mark are from Guangzhou, China, and they are high school sweethearts. After graduating from high school, Elena came to Rutgers while Mark went to Michigan State. They have been on their long-distance journey ever since.
Arguments and fights have always been a problem for long-distance relationships – including Elena and Mark. Elena said she felt insecure when they were not physically together, and the time difference made their words in the chat box lose their genuine emotions. Sometimes “missing” can be spelled as “misunderstanding.”
But they never fought because they did not want to break up, but rather wanted to seek a way to build a stronger relationship. Before Mark left Guangzhou, he took Elena to meet his parents. He believes he should always make Elena feel secure.
During times when they can visit each other, every reunion has been sensational. When they are physically together, they are always trying new things and discovering new food. This spring break, Elena will go to Lansing, and they will try skiing for the very first time.
Being miles away from each other has become a feature of their life. Elena is always thrilled when they are physically together. She thinks Mark and their relationship are deeply embedded into her life. “Seeing each other, traveling to each other’s cities, and diving in love has already become a part of our life, just like eating and sleeping,” said Elena.
Elena never thought her decision to come to Rutgers was a mistake. She even got an offer from Michigan State, but felt that Rutgers was always a better fit for her. They thought falling in love and being together never meant interfering with each other’s personal development. What they learned was that their better selves made their love stronger, even when they are far away from each other.
“I think this lifestyle is perfect for us: we are lovers, but we still have exclusive spaces for me and him,” said Elena. “I am working on my business, and he is studying at Lansing. We are deeply bonded, but we are also free. And we are excited and passionate for our next time to meet.”
Elena said she rarely remembers a time she felt difficulty in their love. She is grateful to have a lover that was meant to be with her. She feels that being anywhere with Mark feels like home.
It has been five years since Elena and Mark first fell in love with each other. Their love story never gets old among their friends. Their crush on each other builds over time since they were in class together in high school. When Elena realized her feelings for Mark, she started to pursue him by bringing him homemade food and bottles of Coke, and would stuff them into his drawers. After the ninth bottle of Coke, Mark finally responded to her with a box of milk. They finally started dating after she wrote him a love letter and he replied with a love note translated into an unfamiliar, but romantic language that he had prepared to say to her for a long time.
In the last two years, Elena distanced from college because of COVID and having to work on her accessory design and retail business in Guangzhou. It was their longest distance away from each other: Lansing to Guangzhou, yet when she came back to campus they were both finally in the states. The two of them plan to go to grad schools that are close to each other after graduating from college. Elena will also take Mark to meet with her family this summer.